When we were little, our fathers went to work, had little to do with childcare, were the breadwinners, and did little house cleaning.
Dads in 2020 are becoming jacks of all trades: I have to be a heavy hitter in the boardroom, a part-time plumber and a loving partner, and know my way around the kitchen.
While I do not understand the plight of mothers or want to change places, the role of the father has morphed. I realize our household does not stick to old-school gender norms, but is there normal anymore? Shouldn’t each parent be able to contribute around the house? I know in my house, I trust my wife to do everything but change the oil in our cars.
In 2020, dads can’t just be great businessmen. Dads are doing more than they ever have before.
With a lot of households being dual-income, we are now taking pay cuts, or less prestigious jobs just to find positions with more work-life balance so we can do more.
I was extremely lucky. My dad came to every swim meet, took me to practices, coached my teams, and supported me (even when he thought I was crazy to focus purely on basketball) wholeheartedly. My mom was always around. She picked me up from school, made breakfast, packed my lunch, and made dinner every night.
Maybe this is where some of my anxiety as a parent comes from. Previous generations provided for their children and only wanted better for them. They wanted higher levels of education, nicer neighborhoods, and to set their kids up.
While I want better for my children than what I had, there are issues that come up:
Can I offer a better situation for my children than I had?
Do my kids NEED a better situation than I had?
What does better than even look like?
Shouldn’t the goal be to provide the very best you can for your children and raise them to be good human beings and guide them to their future?
Maybe that’s the point. By being multidimensional fathers, aren’t we setting our children up for the future? I believe so. We are showing them that they are more than just one thing.
This loving father, doting husband, master homebrewer, part-time plumber, novice pitmaster, and semi-professional diaper changer.